Existentialism for Beginners.

Sometimes, to provide relief from the occasional (wonderful! rewarding! heartwarming!) monotony of hanging out with the kids all the time, I talk nonsense. Occasionally, this strays into cod-existential blatherings. 

For example, if my daughter tells me she’s scared, I now think I am being very funny by telling her ‘We’re all scared. It’s the human condition. Better get used to it, kid.’

Because I am funny, you see.

And that would all be very drôle and clever if if weren't for the fact that my daughter has decided to play me at my own game. 

It all started yesterday. We were walking to school as usual, talking as we went. My daughter was busy telling me that there were crocodiles in the gutter. And dinosaurs. And lions. Then, in a blinding flash of revelation, she had her epiphany. ‘Everyone is monsters,’ she said. 

'Everyone?’ I said, kind of worried. 

‘Yes! Everyone is monsters.’

I had no idea. I mean, sure, in my darker moments, the thought had occurred to me. But to have it confirmed like that, well, I’ll be honest, the air took on a sudden chill, the sun shone a little less brightly.

And the worst part? The worst part was that she found my anguish so damn funny. 

Needless to say, I've hidden all the Kierkegaard.